Tuesday, March 31, 2009

i think i seriously have a problem.
and for that reason, i am attempting to stay off the internets for 24 hours.
hopefully i won't see y'all until sometime around 10:30 pm tomorrow.

peace. out.

i haven't done a meme in a while...so...

finish the sentence...

1. My partner...is the best husband ever.

2. Maybe I should... be doing something more productive.

3. I love...my family, and Cadbury Mini Eggs, & peanut butter and banana sandwiches

4. People would say that...i'm really blunt. for some reason this has been a reoccurring theme in my life. don't know why, i don't feel like i'm overly blunt. hm.

5. I don't understand...a lot of things. But i'm willing to try.

6. When I wake up in the morning...i brush my teeth ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch
hh i brush my teeth.... and then feed the little dude while drinking a bucket of coffee.

7. I lost... my ability to sleep in. i miss sleeping in.

8. Life is full of... surprises. You can plan all you want...

9. My past has taught me... that some people are worth fighting for, and some people simply aren't.

10. I get annoyed when... people don't signal. Seriously, what did you think that little stick on your steering wheel was for? Also, i'm not a frakkin' mind reader!

11. Parties are...no longer the drunk fests of a few years ago, but more like the pop and chips parties of my childhood.

12. I wish... for financial freedom and to stop worrying about stupid things endlessly.

13. Dogs...are too easily excitable, loud, jumpy, and usually in my face. (Except Telly, my little Taurus birthday buddy)

14. Cats... have frakkin' attitude, but are the best snugglers.

15. Tomorrow...is only a day away. While i believe there's a lot to be said for living in the moment, if you don't think about tomorrow your "in the moment" is gonna be filled with a lot of stress cuz you didn't plan ahead.

16. I have a low tolerance for... bullshitters. don't feed me your BS. I can see right through it.

17. If I had a million dollars...I would invest it and live comfortably off the interest while spending the bulk of the crappy winter in warm climates.

18. I'm totally terrified of...alien invasions. Not even a joke. The human race is filled with morons who will fuck it up for the entire planet, i'm sure of it.

19. I'd rather be... thinner and wealthier. i realize money doesn't buy happiness, but i imagine the financial freedom does. Also, i could stand to lose a couple lbs.

20. My vice is... McDonald's French Fries, and laziness...and lack of motivation... and fear.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Why Not Try?

So, for those of you who don't know, i've signed up for a Triathlon. It's just a mini one, a "Try"athlon to be exact - where you're not competing, there's no times, its just to try out a triathlon to see if it's for you.

What i joined was a ladies only training and triathlon.

The first meeting was yesterday afternoon. I was going to try to find someone to do this with me, like my mom, but she's already done the program twice and you can only do it two times. Another friend of mine was very close to signing up and decided not to, which was fine. So in the end, i signed up to do it solo. I'll be fine, right?

So, i get to the meeting and find my way to the gym at the local YWCA where there are several women already there. I wanted to get there early so i wasn't standing at the back when the meeting started.

I signed in, got my welcome package, signed up for my swim time and then took a deep breath. There were mats on the floor for sitting and my first inclination was to sit on the edge of the group somewhere, but i thought to myself - "Laura, you may be terrified, but you'll never meet anyone on the edge of the group" so i walked boldly into the throng of mats and sat down somewhere in the middle.

As people signed in and began finding seats, i looked nervously around me. There was the odd loner here and there, but mostly everyone was doing this program with a buddy or 2. I sent out a shy smile (Oh, yeah, i know it's hard to tell by my blog, but i'm uber shy) to those few ladies sitting alone, and then watched as they, one by one, waved over a friend who was just arriving.

I'm not kidding when i tell you that by the time everyone had arrived and signed in and found their place on the floor, i was the only person sitting alone. Alone in the middle of a crowd. I started having these memories of being the new girl in school flooding back to my brain, and it was overwhelming and almost brought me to tears. I was alone. And suddenly all my confidence that i walked in with flew out the window and i was fourteen again. Or twelve, or ten or eight or six... any one of the times i was forced to start a new school and be a stranger among the already established cliques.

god, i thought i was passed this feeling, being a grown up and all. i immediately sent a text to B-rad telling him i was freaking out, and within seconds he shot one back that said; "You don't need support. You're strong like that. We love you and can't wait to watch you race." he's awesome.

i couldn't get over how easily i felt like a child. it shook me.
I know that in the end, it'll be awesome, I'LL be awesome, it'll all be fine...but that first meeting was awful. It was overwhelming, not only the feeling of being an outcast, but on top of that i felt like everything they were talking about was going over my head no matter how hard i tried to pay attention and to absorb what they were saying.

My first run is Thursday night. They run in pairs. i'm not looking forward to that awkward moment when they realize that i'm a single.

Saturday, March 28, 2009


it's saturday morning and i just had to share something with you all....

when i saw this, i just about cried tears of joy.
we haven't gotten this book for Chewie yet, but now we will for sure!

also, i love the Arcade Fire action happening, love that song.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Grace in Small Things: #15

1. the spherical noggin that is the Charlie Brown head of my son, Chewie. i just love rubbing it, it's SoOoO round.


3. The words Forthwith and Hither

4. learning how to play Joga on guitar so i can sing it.
except i don't do it with a cute Icelandic accent.

5. The empty green glass bottle of Jagermeister that is on my kitchen window ledge, filled with water. When the light passes through it, i can almost forget that it snowed yesterday,...again....

join me in Schmutzie's Grace in Small Things by becoming a member of the Grace in Small Things Social Network

Wednesday, March 25, 2009


Contest Closed!
Congrats to:
Sarah - Winner of the CK1 Limited Edition bottle/MP3 speaker
Witchypoo - winner of a Calvin Klein T-shirt
Melsie - 2nd winner of a Calvin Klein T-shirt
(i've sent you all emails with details of how to get your stuff!)

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

life in bullets

  • hotdogs for breakfast are a perfectly viable food based solution to my hunger problem
  • morning naptime is getting shorter everyday, and that makes me sad.
  • only one day left in the Calvin Klein contest
  • i have been stupidly addicted to eBay this past week, so much so that i have had dreams of auctions and have cursed loudly in eBay's general direction too many times to count
  • i have been crocheting like a crazy lady, someday i'll show ya'll what i've been up to.
  • this week i burned my arm with scalding hot margarine while trying to fry up potatoes for breakfast.
  • B-rad sent me this wonderful link to a youtube video featuring the next item that i will purchase...and love as much as the Rockchick (NSFW)
  • over at Teeni's blog she posted a site where you could make your own custom superhero... this is mine...

  • I've signed up, perhaps against my better judgement for the Try-athlon, the same one my mom did the year after he had pneumonia. Training starts on Sunday.... yikes.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

happiness is...(tmi?)

...watching an "Adult Film" with B-rad and Mystery Science Theatre-ing the crap outta it. Not so much hawt as hilarious.

On the plus side, 4 out of 5 ladies thus far have had real funbags. Yay.
Also, really long nails on porn stars just make me think of all the crap that may be hiding under neath there... gross.

How's your night?

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Calvin Klein - GIVEAWAY!! That's right, free stuff.

Contest Closed!
Congrats to:
Sarah - Winner of the CK1 Limited Edition bottle/MP3 speaker
Witchypoo - winner of a Calvin Klein T-shirt
Melsie - 2nd winner of a Calvin Klein T-shirt
(i've sent you all emails with details of how to get your stuff!)

Remember the good old days of the nineties? ah, 1994.

Doc Martens, multi coloured silk shirts, Pokemon, Street Fighter, Sailor Moon hits the North American airwaves (and it takes off in Canada! oh, Tuxedo Mask...), and an amazing phenomenon called "The Net" was sweeping the globe and finding it's way into home offices and PCs everywhere as the Commodore Computer quietly bowed out of existence.

Back when bands like Pearl Jam and Soundgarden showed us that it was cool, nay sexy, to be unwashed and dress like a depressed lumberjack, when Wacko Jacko married Elvis' baby girl, Lisa Marie, when adolescent boys and girls everywhere mourned the loss of their blond haired blued eyed poet, Kurt.

Ross and Rachel and the rest of the Friends at Central Perk took to the small screen, hypercolor shirts were embarrassing teenage year boys and girls in gym classes everywhere, and Calvin Klein declared that we could all smell the same!

In 1994 i was fourteen, and finding my way and my self in the eighth grade... a freshman in my small town high school. Living on the farm in BC, isolated from a lot of afterschool activities, i got a lot of my information about life, sex, music, and what was cool on the 30 minute school bus ride to and from school everyday. On that bus i learned things from the older girls that i had no business knowing at that age. I idolized the older girls who sat in the back of the bus, snapping their sugar free gum and laughing too loudly at the jokes the boys made.

One girl captivated me every morning. Her name was Rhonda, she had the longest thickest most beautiful hair i had ever seen and a white windbreaker jacket that was so clean and crisp. She was an only child and had no younger brothers to soil her pristine jacket. She may have been my first girl-crush, she was 3 years older than me and her parents were well off, the exact opposite of my barely-scraping-by-with-three-brothers existence that i had been living. And she always wore Exclamation Perfume. (Ex-cla-mation! Make a Statement...without saying a word) I am not ashamed to tell you that i knew this because i spent one afternoon smelling all the perfume in the drug store until i found her brand.

So, you can imagine my surprise when she got on the bus one morning and she wasn't followed by her signature scent! It was something else, something sweet and musky. To make a long story of bus stalking and purfume bottle sniffing short, it was CK 1, Calvin Klein's unisex scent.

For someone who only made $2.00 an hour babysitting, there was no way i could afford to wear it, and for a while i would save the pull out sniffy inserts in the magazines in the drug store... and eventually i somehow managed to get my hands on the knock off version of the scent. (I only ever owned knock offs until about 3 years ago when i finally shelled out $70.00 for a scent i love).

CK One has always had a soft spot in my heart, and so has Rhonda and her white windbreaker jacket. So, when i was asked if i was willing to giveaway a Limited Edition bottle of CK One with BUILT IN MP3 Speaker to a lucky Canadian Resident (Sorry, Canucks only on this one) i jumped at the chance!

This limited edition is available exclusively at Shoppers Drugmarts, but you can have this one!!
So why are they doing this? This fragrance has been relaunched, why:
The idea behind relaunch of the ck one fragrance is about bringing people together, regardless of their differences in age, culture, race or gender. It's about coming together, through the common and universal language of music.

sounds good? So, if you're a canuck and you want to win this bottle, drop me a line in the comments. As usual, a linkey-loo on your site will guarantee you another entry! (please make sure you let me know in the comments that you've linked on your site) But it doesn't end there, 2 other lucky Canadiano's will win this fancy schmancy Calvin Klein T-shirt!! Pretty sweet deal, huh? I thought so. If you're a crackbook facebook user, you can check out the CKOne page if not, you can head over to the Website for more details!

So, this contest will end Wednesday March 25th at 5pm Central time.

So, who wants to walk down memory lane??

Tuesday, March 10, 2009


Ahhh yeah, it's all done!

Well, everything except the caulking, i haven't started the caulk yet. Nope, not the caulk. But i will, i will.

and i ALMOST did it all by my self. I'd say it was 85% Laura, 15% B-rad. Woot Woot.

Monday, March 09, 2009

I prefer clear caulk, myself.

This weekend i finally started a project i've been meaning to start since we moved into the house.

I started redoing the downstairs bathroom, to make it into the 'kids' bathroom.

Here's before:

I think at one point there used to be a tenant living downstairs? anyway, this bathroom seemed like it was thrown together at the last minute. The walls aren't level, or square, the ceiling is at different levels, the tub surround is made of a piece of linoleum.

I think that the cupboard was just built out of leftover stuff as well, cuz again, that's not level, and it doesn't meet up to the walls. So, i think whoever built this bathroom decided that to fix that problem, they'd just PILE ON THE CAULK! But instead of using something like Clear, or White, they went with - i imagine - whatever they had lying around, which was Off-white, and it looks like they just gooped it on and ran they're finger over it. Nice.

Actually, the caulk is what really made me want to redo this bathroom. No matter how much i cleaned it there, it always ALWAYS looked dirty just because the caulk was off white and not smooth so it trapped junk in the grooves.

Taking that off was SO MUCH FUN! *Please note sarcasm*, it really sucked actually. It was REALLY super thick in some areas, and really thin in others.

Next we took off that stylish oak and brass light fixture to find some very delightful 80s wallpaper underneath that i didn't think to take a picture of, sorry.

But B-rad did take this picture of me remudding where the light fixture was. why yes, i AM mudding with a butter knife! We didn't have one of those scrapper dealies, and this worked just as well.

I spent most of last night and a lot of this morning edging and painting in there,... but you'll have to wait to see the finished product. I have to do what i can while Chewie is napping, which he's doing RIGHT NOW... so i should get in there and do another coat while i can!

Stay tuned for more painting fun times!

Friday, March 06, 2009

a few links and stuff

I've written a new letter for Chewie, see my sidebar or head over to the Rockstar blog

I've also written another review at The Book Nook, and while you're over there check out this Five-Star Review giveaway that ends today at 5pm

Here's a poem i wrote on our magnetic poetry board for the B-rad (please don't steal my poetry)

Also, check out this amazing video - stop motion, so amazing...

(thanks Nat for bringing this to my life!)

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

There's a story in here, somewhere...

check out my calvin klein giveaway!!

The year was 2003, i was freshly moved in with my B-rad and living in Cowtown with my brother as a roomie. It was still fresh enough that i was still dazzled by the sheer size of Cowtown and the volume of people everywhere i went. I was a small town girl in the big city, and my boyfriend was coming to play at Mac Hall. This go-round he wasn't fronting for TOOL, but with his side project A Perfect Circle, touring for their second album Thirteenth Step.

The Hall was in the basement of the local university, and we stood in line for what seemed forever as they ushered us in, like the cattle we were, frisking us down for drugs, or weapons, whathaveyou. I have never seen so many dark haired, black wearing, mean looking teenagers and young adults in such a well lit venue before. The hall lights of the University were full on, creating a crazy contrast to the pell-mell of testosterone fueled lads and thick eye linered ladies.

It's not that i had never been to a rock concert before, or a metal concert. But those were at the Stadium, and the stadium hall lights are just barely even on. Everything is dark. Not like the humming buzzing fluorescent lights of the Halls of Higher Learning where we were all waiting for admission to this metal concert.

Inside, there was already a swell of bodies crowded around the stage. We pushed and prodded our way into the centre of the throng. I'll give us Canadians one thing, even in this situation, we are still inevitably polite, and we *ever so politley* allow those to nudge their way in front of us, and even apologize when they stomp on our feetsies in the process.

When B-rad and i were satisfied with where we were, we planted those feetsies and *so politely* stood our ground against the gang of girlies who where shoving their way, hand in hand, like a chain of adolescent sex on wheels, to the front of the crowd.

Hm, i thought, this might not be a good time to mention my slight claustrophobia... nah, i'll keep it to myself for a while.

The worst part of waiting for the band to take the stage is the waiting. And the waiting is made worse by the current of people moving all around you. But finally, thank God, the first band took the stage. Pygmy Love Circus, an underground metal band from L.A., a little loud and thrashy for me, but hey... they played a good set, fairly entertaining... loud and screamy... nothing like Maynards lovely vocals.

after their set, the band leaves the stage and the house lights come up a bit, and the crowd is all swarmed together after the energy of the last band. during this intermission, some sound guy somewhere plays music over the speakers while people filter in and out of the beer gardens.

and it happens.
the sound of the acoustic guitar strumming over the sound of the crowd. and it. is. mesmerizing.
and before we know it, without knowing why or how, in that horde of angry youth - in the skunk-smoke filled air, the sweaty bodies mashing into each other,.... we all start to sing.

It was one of the most magical moments of my life, in a weird way. And everyone in that crowd that night knew it, something amazing was happening. People were passing their joints around, the air was thick with the stuff. The person who had been annoying the hell out of us just minutes earlier was now part of this crazy phenomenon, and we were all joined by this incredible moment, swaying back and forth it felt like one giant group hug.

That a congregation of metal heads could come together this way with a rock ballad?? - utterly amazing.

And we sang the words loud and strong! those with lighters held them high, arms were slung over stranger's shoulders. Because we ALL KNEW!! We knew, with our whole beings, that Every Rose Has It's Thorn.

To tell you the honest truth, i don't remember much about what came after. I know my boyfriend rocked, he apologized for W. Bush, i had a panic attack (turns out i really was claustrophobic) but i don't remember much of the music. What i remember, was how Poison united us that night, in Mac Hall. Thank You Poison.

Gettin' my hate on for hospital emergency rooms

i hate Hospital Emergency Rooms.


But, sometimes there comes a time in every mother's life where she has to buckle down and say "Y'know, this is not about me" and that time was last night. Chewie had been working on the same fever for over 2 days and i was getting concerned that he might be getting a tad dehydrated, and he was listless and not eating...and we could get the fever down with T ylen0l but as soon as it wore off his temperature would rise again. So, we packed him up and trekked him to the horsepiddle.

i really hate Emergency Rooms. Have i mentioned that? i have? hm.

Sitting in the ER, the Worry and Nerves were palpable, like a mist in the air and you couldn't help but walk through it. That shit gets in your hair and in your pores, on your clothes. As a person with an ALREADY over reactive stomach of nerves, it didn't take long before my insides were doing flip flops and spectacular high dives off an Olympic Standard Diving Board.

Not only that, but you can't help but sit and judge the state of every one's emergencies. Twisted ankles, heart attacks, stomach pain (guilty of that one just 2 short months ago)... and it's hard not to feel every one else's eyes on you thinking that your emergency couldn't be worse than theirs.

The thing with a sick infant, though, is that you tend to jump up the line. As we were waiting for the triage nurse to check Chewie's temperature, another family came in with a boy about 18 months who also had a fever. As the triage nurse said when she eventually did check Chewie's temp - after checking the other little boy (grrrrr, we were there first yadda yadda yadda) "It's the battle of the sick babies". Seriously? Then, as the thermometer beeped she said; "Okay, he wins" and we went from the waiting room, to the littler waiting room.

Inside the gates of ER we were greeted with a stench, like somebody shit their pants, and likely someone had. I don't think it's very easy to get rid of that smell. Maybe they could have attempted though, for our benefit, to spray a little Febreeze or light a match or something.

We were taken to the same watiting room that i was in the last time for my gallstones. weird huh?

After being assessed by a student with an awesome Taurus Tattoo on his left wrist, we waited, trying to keep Chewie awake for the doctor. He showed up eventually, a man in his sixties with his shirt unbuttoned, tie still tied tight, wearing jeans and dress shoes. He gave our son the once over and calmed our fears by telling us that it was nothing serious, but we were right to come in for an assessment after such a long fever.

We do have a Health Line that we can call in this province, and we did call there. After giving the nurse on the line our info, she terrified me by saying that she was trying to decide whether or not we should drive Chewie to the hospital or whether she should send an ambulance. It's so hard to tell over the phone, and they almost ALWAYS just tell you to go to the hospital.

We told this to the doctor, who reminded me of Johnny Fever from WKRP in Cincinnati, and he hearkened back to the days of Family Doctors, house calls, and Docs on Call. His opinion was that had there still been Docs on Call we mightn't have been sent in to the ER. Given the circumstances, a baby with a fever for a prolonged period of time could be a number of things, meningitis, or ear infections, or kidney problems. This particular time, the doc chalked it up to teething with a possible virus on top of that. With his immune system lowered from the teething it would be easy for him to catch a bug... and with him being 8 months, and a preemie at that, better to be safe than sorry.

I really hate Hospital Emergency Rooms. I hate the wait, i hate the stress, the worry, the wait, the eyes of other patients, the wait, the smell, the wait.... i really really hate them. but i'm glad we went in, because i knew i wouldn't be sleeping...i couldn't relax until i knew that he was going to be okay. I mean, what if he DID have something serious, and we waited and he got really sick?

My younger brother, Patrick, got really sick when he was a few months old, he had one of those seizures brought on by fever - and my mom told me that she just happened to go into his room. He was limp, and burning up. My mother screamed, my dad put him in a bath of cold water and shocked him awake. He was rushed to the hospital. Now, he has only partial vision in one of his eyes that may be a direct result from his high fever. With that constantly in the back of my head, you can't blame me for trying to be extra cautious with my son. can you?

We got home around 11:30 pm, and we put our exhausted little peanut to bed. He slept until about 5 this morning.

This morning Chewie seemed to be getting better. He ate some breakfast, but still needed to cuddle. as much as i love the cuddle time, i'm happy he's recovering.

Sunday, March 01, 2009

sick baby

oh god, Chewie has been fighting a high fever all day. It started this morning when he woke up around 5. after feeding him, he just wouldn't go back to sleep, he just cried and cried. I would pick him up and he would fall almost instantly asleep in my arms, but the second i put him down he'd start up again.

so, in an effort to at least let ONE person in the household get some sleep, Chewie and i went downstairs and sat on the recliner, and sort of slept until about 8 when b-rad took over and i got some rest.

It wasn't until later in the day that b-rad pointed out that this really isn't like our son to be so cuddly and needy. While sleeping in my arms this afternoon - around 3, he started to really feel warm so i took him upstairs to check his temperature and it was 38.2C (taken at his armpit) so i immediately took all his clothes off and started wiping him down with a wet cloth. I called B-rad, who was out running a few errands, and he came home as soon as he could. I gave him some T ylen0l and it helped for a while.

B-rad and i have done nothing today except wipe our baby with a wet cloth, and i feel like i've done nothing but nurse all day.

it's heartbreaking to see him so uncomfortable, and just now when i was put on a mandatory leave of absence from the bedroom for the sake of my sanity, chewie lay there on the bed, weak and so tired, reaching for me crying. It was awful. i feel awful, like i've abandoned him somehow.

he wants, desperately, for me to hold him and rock him and nurse him, and i want those things too, but it doesn't take him very long to get warm again while sleeping on my chest.

we gave him more drugs a little while ago, so i think he's cooling off a bit. i hope so, poor little man desperately needs rest.
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