Wednesday, October 31, 2007
31/31 - x365 Ardath M.
i can only imagine what it must have been like for you to be an unwed mother in a small Mormish Town in 1955. I always compared you to my other grandmother, while she was all full of hugs and kisses and 'i love yous', you were standoffish and closed. You bonded through crafts. As an adult, our relationship changed, and i'm pretty sure i'm your favourite grandkid. I sometimes wonder, though, if your bonding with me is because you didn't know how to bond with dad, and maybe somehow that makes up for it. When i found out you had breast cancer, i didn't know how to act. I hardly saw you or talked to you - but living in Cowtown, only a few hours away, i was able to visit more often. I remember sitting on your couch and you telling me the road to your diagnosis, and that you were afraid. I had never seen vulnerability in you before. You were always tough as nails. You still are, but you opened that window just a crack and let me in just a tad. That's enough.
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What worries me the most about modern 'society' is that we have lost the connection to the past by talking to those that lived it. The MTV generation may have lost this forever, and that worries me. Prying the memories and experiences from our elders is hard when you are younger, because you just don't know how to do it. By the time you want to and have figured it out, most of that generation are gone.
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