[from offstage]: CUT! Cut!

[murmuring from surround cast and crew members as the director leaps off his chair and approaches our star who is standing in a single spotlight]

[director]: Do you mind telling me what the hell that was all about?

[Laura]: uh...

[director]: There is no Drama Queen soliloquay in this scene. What are you doing?

[Laura]: uhm, i don't know, i guess i was just venting.

[director]: you can't do that...you can just jump from a friendly Googlememe straight into that messy goo. seriously. what the fuck?

[Laura]: well, i was ju-

[director]: [interrupts] never mind that. we have a show to run here, and we don't have time for your little pity party of one. okay? so, go outside, take a walk... clear your head... take a few minutes... and then get your ass back in the game, capiche?

[Laura]: [mistified] yeah, uh. okay,....sure. thanks.

[director]: atta girl. [to the cast and crew] Everybody!?!?? We have a code 3 drama queen crisis, take five! Smoke 'em if you got 'em. [to himself] and to think i gave up directing Carrottop's blog for this.