TT#3 - Growing up Mormish

DISCLAIMER:
The members of the Mormon faith are on the whole, very kind and generous people. My Mom and Dad both come from Mormon families, and they raised me and my 3 brothers in the only Faith they knew. Please do not assume that because i decided to leave the Church that they are crazy or cultish or what have you. These thirteen tidbits are only MY perception of Church. What i remember from my own experiences and i did not write them with the intention of hurting anyone in anyway.

If you're still with me, read on:





Thirteen Things About Growing Up Mormon

1. - Mormon girls are trained to be mothers from the time they're born. It's like they take our biological clock and turn it back 5 years so we start getting the urge to get hitched and have babies around the age of 17 rather than in our twenties. They are taught 'home making' skills and even have meetings during the week...called "Home Making" where they expound upon those skills. By the age of 12, the girls and boys are seperated for an hour of the three and there they learn how to be worthy wives for returned missionaries so they can all get married in the Temple and be sealed for time and all eternity.

2. - I had to attend 3 hours of church for every sunday of my life. Dad said: "Until you turn 18, you're still a child in my house and i am responsible for your spiritual welfare. After that, you're an adult and you can do whatever you want." i stopped going to church the sunday after my 18th birthday. That means, that by my 18th birthday i had attended roughly 2808 hours of church .

3. - My Dad has never had more than one wife ever. Mormons don't do that anymore, they stopped doing it officially in 1890. The ones that still do it, are not Mormon. All through grade school people have asked me if i have more than one mom.

4. - I have never, nor has anyone i have ever known, been in one of the LDS commercials.

5. - LDS stands for Latter Day Saints. I once wore a shirt to school that said "Especially for Youth LDS Conference" and a friend of mine thought it said LSD conference... I told him no, but it probably would have made the conference more interesting if they were passing out tabs of acid.

6. - Mormons don't drink coffee or tea and by extension Coke and Iced Tea are also no-nos. They also don't drink alcohol or use tobacco, or do drugs. They are some clean living peoples... my mom will drink a coke every now and then when she's driving and needs to stay awake - that's how much caffiene it takes for her to stay up. Me, i'd probably have to have an hourly injection of espresso into my veins to stay awake.

7. - 8 is the standard age for baptism, although they say that it's the youngest that you can do it meaning you can wait if you want to, but nobody waits. I wanted to... i mean, if it means that you can be wiped clean of all your sins - why not wait until you're like 25 and then go and have some fun, it'll all be wiped away anyway. I was baptised by immersion when i was eight years old and confirmed a member of the Church.

8. - i have not gone to church in 9 years. my records are still in the Head Records Office in Salt Lake City. To have them removed is a big long process involving interviews with my Bishop etc etc etc. I haven't done this yet. Mostly because i think it would kill my mom and dad. Let them hang on to some hope that i'll come back if it makes them feel better. i won't though.

9. - Mormons are big on family. BIG. it's not unusual to find a Mormon family in Utah, or in Southern Alberta with 6 or more kids. When God said "Replenish the Earth" i think they took it to mean them personally. I have 3 brothers, which wasn't a big family then, but it sure is now. But the Church's emphasis on family paired with our seclusion on the farm made us learn to like each other. I love my family, and i really love spending time with them. In high school my brothers were my friends and every time one of my girl friends would say: "I hate my Brother!" i would be shocked! i coudn't even fathom hating a sibling. i still can't.

10. - Mormons are not supposed to date until they are 16. And even then, it should be group dates - leaving the "Serious" dating until you're preparing for marriage. I had my first boyfriend in grade four. I could never tell my parents about my boyfriends, and as a direct result of that - i couldn't tell them when my grade 8 boyfriend did an awful terrible thing to me, because then they would know i was dating. Years later, when i actually was 16, i still kept my boyfriends from my family out of habit. I couldn't ask my mother about birth control, or any type of "female" questioning because i felt it would lead to questions about who i was dating. B-rad was the very first boy i ever introduced to my mom and dad as my boyfriend when i was 18.

11. - When B-rad and i started dating, his mother was none to happy that her little Mennonite boy was dating a Mormon. It was tense. One time, in the first couple of months of our courtship, i went over to his house and in their living room on the coffee table was a Christian Book on Cults that was coincidentally left open to the Mormon page. Fear of the unknown makes people a little crazy i think. Luckily, over seven years that B-rad and i dated, she got to know my mom and dad and eventually eased up on the craziness. i think both sets of parents have come to the realization that B-rad and i are not religious. We are both extremely spiritual in our own way - but have no use for organized religion. (i'm sure this will become an issue again once we decide to have kids....)

12. - Mormons believe that mankind has the potential to become like God and have your own Universe. Only the extremely worthy get that. The details on that are a little sketchy to me, cuz you don't get that info until you go and do sessions in the Temple, which i've never done.

13. - Mormons believe in 3 stages of Heaven. Terrestrial, Telestial, and Celestial - Celestial being the highest Glory and where God, and Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit reside. They also believe that the members of the Godhead are three distinctly different people, not an all-in-one diety.

So, there it is.

I have my feelings about The Church, some good, some bad, some very annoyed, some extremely angry - but as much as i don't agree with them or their beliefs, i respect their right to believe it. And i will come to their defense whenever i can.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

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1. Kendra

2. Robin

3. Karina

4. Scooper

5. Frigga

6. Nancy

7. What Works for Us

8. Susan B.

9. Jennieboo

10. Denise - sorry Denise, i couldn't get your link :(

11. Pat J

12. So Lost

13. Damozel

14. Samara

15. Destined For Greatness

16. Joystory

17. Gentleman's Domain

18. your name here

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