Pirates all around, rum for everyone!!

"i'm a pirate!"
"how do you figure?"
"uhm...the rum, obviously."
"yeah, but pirates drink dark rum."
"they COULD drink light rum"
"they don't."
"i'm PirateLite! after i drink this rum, i'm going to rape and pillage a small village"
"Sounds like you're making an Action Plan for later tonight."
"Maybe i am."
"what's the difference between pillaging and plundering."
"uhm, Pillaging is going in and wreckin' stuff, and plundering is the act of stealing stuff."
"are you sure?"
"yes. uhm no. maybe?"
"let's look it up...so plundering and pillaging mean taking things by force"
"Hm....so breaking into someone's house and taking all their shit, that's stealing, but if you walk up to them and forcefully take something, that's pillaging?"
"i thought that was mugging"
"oh yeah."
"raping and pillaging sounds so much better than raping and plundering."
"so really it's only a matter of whether or not rape is involved."
"i guess so."