So, here i am still biding my time in Calgary... i've been staying with my little brutha and his very charming roommates. Seriously, these 2 roommates of his are so super nice. And to repay these guys for their hospitality i brought them the flu virus - home grown in saskatoon.
The day i left, the husband was keeled over with the flu. couldn't even properly kiss me goodbye and run after the car like an old black and white hollywood love story. how rude. Anyway, i was sure that the flu would bitch slap me the very next day, but hey! i was healthy as a horse with a head cold! and on to day 2! still healthy...
Wednesday, though.... that was the real kicker. After a healthy bout of vomitting and other disgusting flu-like symptoms, i slept for 10 hours in the morning....got up, watched "40 year old Virgin" which made me think of brad :) ... some family guy, then Patrick (my brother) got home from work and we had to make a trip to Canadian Tire to buy a battery post cleaner**.
**the reason for the battery post cleaner is: a few months ago Patrick borrowed my mom's Honda from saskatoon because he got himself a new job the required having his own vehicle. so, he bussed home, drove the honda back to calgary, and then bought himself a new shiny car...leaving the honda to sit in the cold. The plan is for me to drive the honda home with me next weekend - but now it won't start. we tried to jump it, but the battery posts were all filthy
So, Patrick and I walk into Canadian Tire and i begin to look around for automotives. i notice that a young pretty thing has walked up to my brother and they are chatting it up! Hm, i think, he must know this girl. As i approach the two, i realize that he doesn't, in fact, know this person. She is just an extremely aggressive Canadian Tire Credit Card Pusher. and she was gooooood. so smooth, she was already filling out the form before patrick knew what hit him.... but once he realized that this cute chicky did not want to flirt with him, he gathered his wits about him and said..."....uhhh, i dunno.....it's all happening kinda fast.... maybe i'd like to think about this..."
that didn't stop her, she just kept giving him more reasons why an Optimum card is, like, soooo awesome!
But he stood his ground, and wouldn't give her his name... then she turns on me and says:
"what about you?"
(keep in mind, i'm still dazed from the flu)
"uhhh, no thanks. i don't even live in this city." Nice one! good recovery, good excuse, you're doing ooookayyyyy.
"All you have to do is live in the country!"
(to which i replied, throwing my hands in the air..."
"I live in IRAQ!"
WHAT??? I LIVE IN IRAQ! THAT'S THE BEST I COULD DO?oh my lord. this may be, the most stupid thing that i have ever said...in my entire life!
the girl, well... she just had no idea what just happened... i apologized, told her i didn't live in iraq, i just really don't want a card.
as Patrick and i walked away, he started to snicker, i looked over at him and he said: "I live in IRAQ? what the hell was that?!?"
"I don't know! honestly, i don't know. i have the flu, it's the only country i could think of! i think it's from watching all that Arrested Development yesterday! what a moron!"
Patrick and i spent the rest of the night shouting: I live in IRAQ! anytime anyone asked us a question, and then bursting into childish laughter.
at least we can laugh about it. i'll miss patrick. :(
incidently, we found the battery post cleaner, cleaned the posts...but it did nothing! so it looks like today we're going to have to buy a new battery for the car. i'm going to keep my mouth shut this time, i promise.